When I Grow Up - A Memoir (2008 Book)
Juliana's book was published by Wiley in 2008.
It's still available at Amazon.
Spiketop has a set of photos from an LA in store session in September 2008.
The Boston Phoenix had an excerpt of Chapter 34 ('Windows') (now offline but viewable in the scanned pres skit below or at the Wayback Machine), which details the series of events surrounding her depression and cancellation of her European tour in 1995:
It felt like this time, unlike all the others, the cloud wasn’t going to dissipate. This infernal woe had spread its poison all through my brain and body, as well as the city and sky, and I couldn’t see any way out. And I had to go on tour. It was all planned and scheduled and arranged. I guessed going on the road would be no worse than sitting in my apartment waiting for the end of the world, alone.
It’s so difficult to describe a bad depression. Even if one could capture it in all its blank, dead horror, she would know that there was not really any point in telling anyone else. Talking about how one’s blood has run cold, or dry, or black, doesn’t bring any relief. It’s as tedious for the sufferer as for the listener. Telling someone is only burdening him with a big problem that doesn’t appear to have any solution: it hurts to be awake. The morbidly depressed person’s only hope is for unconsciousness; for the gift of sleep to free her for the requisite seven or eight hours each night. Even then, disrupted or stunted sleep is often part of the problem.
The New York Times had an interview:
"You find yourself approaching middle age, playing another scuzzy rock club, trying to hold onto your dignity, but the toilet is overflowed, and the place stinks of stale beer. I still have all the faith and love for my music and yet I’m still playing places for kids."
Juliana on Don't by Dinosaur Jr. from an interview offering a playlist of accompanying music to the book at largeheartedboy.com:
"It was maybe the most authentically tortured and anguished vocal performance I'd ever had the pleasure (or horror) to witness."
Juliana reading exceprts and discussing the book at Northeastern University, Boston, USA on 14 January 2009:
Press Kit
Juliana’s 2008 Press Kit from publicists Big Hassle contained some of the aforementioned interviews and more on the How To Walk Away album. View the whole kit as a pdf or individual images relevant to the book below:
Chapter List
August 1: Hoboken
Vision
August 2: Philadelphia
In the Woodshed
August 3: New York City
Angel Girl
August 4: North Bergen to Boston
The Interview Interview
August 5: Cambridge
Sassy
August 7: Cleveland
Big Money
August 8: Columbus
The Story of "My Sister"
August 9: Indianapolis
Cool Rock Boys
August 10: Chicago
Guns and Roses and Me
August 11: Iowa City
My Idol
August 12: Minneapolis
The Harpsichord
August 13: Minneapolis to Kearney
Hair and Makeup
August 15: Denver to Wendover
Jeff Buckley
August 16: Wendover to San Francisco
August 17: San Francisco
The Telecommunications Act of 1996
August 18: San Francisco to Los Angeles
August 19: L.A.
Demons
August 20: San Diego
August 21: Tucson
Begging to Be Dropped
August 22: Albuquerque
August 23: Albuquerque to Oklahoma City
August 24: Lawrence
Hunger
August 25: St. Louis
The Last Leg
The Year of No Music
How to Walk Away
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